2. Procrastination
Procrastination is a very powerful signal telling you that it is time to involve someone else.
It signals that your path is blocked and that you need help. Will you look for someone who can help, or stand by alone? That is the question.
The larger your personal ambition, the more often and the longer you will experience procrastination. Anyone with ambition procrastinates. It is a default consequence of having a goal far greater than yourself. But for most people, procrastination does not produce results. On the contrary, it leads to laziness, regret, and frustration. And when the power and confidence to move forward run short, ambition soon disappears entirely.
When procrastinating, there are only two options. The first, most common approach is to ask yourself, 'How do I do this?' Generally this only causes more procrastination. 'How?' is the question society and the public education system have trained us to ask the moment we form a goal or a wish. The more effective second option is to shift the question to 'Who can help me do this?' By the simple method of changing your question, you can stop procrastinating and step out of discouragement. Instead, you will experience an increase in energy, confidence, and creativity. You can vary this question slightly. 'Who can achieve this goal for me?' Who has the skills, the knowledge, the network, and the expertise to achieve this as quickly as possible?
Every time you think of a new goal or wish, 'who' should pop out automatically. By asking newer and better questions, immediate progress will begin even on your biggest goals. You will use other people's time, knowledge, network, and capabilities, and you will no longer limit possibilities by insisting on doing everything yourself. To eliminate procrastination by asking 'who' rather than 'how', two essential steps are needed.
• Make the goal extremely clear.
• Ask yourself: Who can help me achieve this goal?
How did Metallica come to sell more than 100 million records? "When you say what you want, and even one person hears you, a productive cycle can begin." – Joshua Wolf Shenk
The Impact Filter
"Just because you have an ability doesn't mean you must use it."
Key points.
People waste a substantial part of their lives on procrastination.
Procrastination arises when you ask 'How?' instead of 'Who?' when you have a goal.
Procrastination blocks well-being, brings feelings of frustration, and ultimately costs you your ambition, among other negative effects.
Yet, paradoxically, procrastination is a wise act. Your inner genius is telling you, 'This is an amazing goal. But you are not the right person to do everything related to it!'
Leadership includes articulating a clear vision.
The Impact Filter is written on a single page.
The Impact Filter is a tool that defines a vision or goal and lays out why it matters to everyone involved.
If you have never truly committed to a massive goal, asking 'Who can help me accomplish this?' can be hard.
There are countless bright, capable people waiting who want to help you. All they need is to hear and understand your vision.
Diligence is a necessary virtue, but one to handle with care. You must not miss more important things because you pour effort into work you don't need to do yourself, or work you are not good at. Far too often people treat effort itself as the highest honor. But if there is someone who can do the job more easily and more effectively, why must you, who are not good at it, insist on doing it yourself? When there is someone who can produce the desired result faster and better, it is far wiser to entrust it to them.
"No one has ever been disadvantaged by being humble, paying attention, and being useful."
From a cost-centered mindset to an investment-centered mindset
"Only when you stop trying to do everything and stop wanting everyone's approval can you truly contribute the most to what really matters." – Greg McKeown
If you are investment-oriented, you will form transformative relationships not only with yourself but with others. You will take the long view, prepare for the future, and form ever larger visions. You will come to see that by investing in the talent you work with, your future can progress dramatically. And every decision you make will be transformative rather than transactional. For example, suppose you take a day off work to spend time with family. Taking a day off is not an expense; it is an investment of a day in the people you love. When you shift your focus from cost to investment, you stop worrying about what you are giving up. Instead, you come to see that enormous gains can come from making decisions that are more valuable and more meaningful.
"You can survive without a community,
but you cannot thrive without one."
Key points
Focusing on 'how' limits your capacity to make money.
• Abandon the belief that personally wrestling with 'how' and carrying it out yourself is always the noble act. It is never noble.
If you focus on 'how', you fixate on scarcity and cost-avoidance and miss the big picture.
Obsessing over 'how' while trying to avoid cost ends up costing you and your future enormously in the long run.
If you see collaborators as investments rather than costs, you can grow revenue and profit ten or one hundred times faster.
If you see collaborators as investments rather than costs, you can create transformative relationships rather than calculative ones. In a transformative relationship everyone receives more than they give.
You must see your time as an investment rather than a cost. Then you can expand your freedom of time, money, relationships, and purpose.
There is no true 'perfection', only 'completion'. Completing the work that is in front of you is better than holding on trying to make it perfect.
"What people most want to buy is their own future."
Be fully open, communicate quickly, and ask for help. "A painful emotion ceases to be painful the moment we picture it clearly and precisely."
– Viktor Frankl, quoting Spinoza's Ethics in Man's Search for Meaning
"Anything human can be spoken of, and anything that can be spoken of is easier to handle. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. When we can share that important story with someone we trust, they can remind us that we are not alone." – Mister Rogers
Pushing hard toward a goal, you inevitably hit a point where you get stuck. It may be because the method you chose was too difficult, or simply because life is not going your way. At such times it is better to let your feelings out faster. The more honestly you open up to those around you, the faster the situation moves forward. When you are struggling or exhausted, the worst thing you can do is to hide it and keep it secret. When you stop resisting your emotions and become honest about them, you feel less crushed by them. Sharing your emotions with others lets you see them differently. If you try to avoid painful emotions they only grow into larger shadows that swallow you. Facing them head-on reveals the way out and gives you the strength to go forward. Dan Sullivan said, "All progress begins by telling the truth." I learned that lesson while writing this book. The schedule during the writing was tight. So for several weeks the work in front of me felt a bit overwhelming. But I didn't tell anyone that progress was stalled or that the work was too heavy. I just struggled alone, put things off, piled on stress, and eventually got severely ill.
Had I had the courage to share what I wanted sooner, the work would have been easier.
"Getting results does not take that much time. What eats up time is failing to get results."
Key points
Wherever good work is seen, collaboration is happening.
• You do not have all the answers. It is wise to admit your ignorance and seek other perspectives and solutions with an open mind.
Do not get trapped inside your project and cling to it alone. Get feedback fast and move forward.
Communicate openly and honestly. Ask for help when you need it.
Try to be a hero to the people you work with. Then they will try to be your hero too. And together you will put your strength into doing your very best.
Winning comes through collaboration, not competition
"Creative people are motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others." – Ayn Rand
"Entrepreneurs base their lives on results. What matters is not time or effort but results."
Isolated inside your own goal, the door of opportunity closes
"An overly self-centered attitude leads to isolation. As a result, loneliness, fear, and anger fill you. Extreme self-centeredness is the source of suffering." – Dalai Lama
From our elementary-school years, we were taught that receiving help from others is a kind of shortcut or cheating. So we are not used to asking colleagues for help or requesting their capabilities. Yet in business and in life, collaboration is of enormous importance. Getting help from others not only enables success but also brings deep meaning and a sense of belonging. The amount we can accomplish alone in life is smaller than we think.
When you focus on 'the method', you become isolated inside your goal. The mistaken notion that 100 percent of the responsibility to complete the work lies with you makes you focus on method. This may lead to diligence, but ultimately it is unwise. Doing countless tasks by ordinary means and working yourself to death does not bring a matching reward. What matters is not the process of pouring time and effort in, but the results. You must produce proper results, not merely work hard. If you stand isolated alone inside your goal, perspective is damaged. You develop a limited view of your own possibilities and those of others, and you twist into a cynical person. You fail to recognize the contributions of others, and at the same time underestimate even your own capacities. You fail to properly grasp what you can do and what you can become. You even restrict the scope and possibilities. Your vision shrinks and you focus on what you can do alone. Then not getting along with others is the natural next step. You see others, including yourself, with a dogmatic, inflexible attitude. If you go on like this, thinking closes up, and you cannot grow into a leader or decision-maker. Even aside from leadership, no one with a self-righteous and narrow view is welcomed. In that state you cannot experience the joy of work, the power of teamwork, or growing success. Beyond that, not only freedom but all possibilities become restricted. What is the solution that keeps you from being isolated inside your goal? To ask, 'Who can help me accomplish this?' All you have to do is find the right person for the job.
There is no need at all to feel guilty about not doing everything yourself. Receiving help does not mean you are incompetent or lacking skill. It is not cheating. Moreover, there are plenty of excellent, talented people who want to help with your goals and purposes. There are also plenty of people who want your help for their own goals and purposes. Why spend time feeling guilty and frustrated when the right person exists?
Instead of clinging to what you are not good at and limiting your own ability, gladly accept the people who are willing to help you and want to help you. Conversely, you can be that person for someone else. Then you will feel gratitude that such wonderful people exist.
"The only way to be remembered fondly is to build up the abilities of others."
Winners help each other; losers compete
"Competition is for losers." – Peter Thiel
Humans have survived and flourished because of their ability to communicate and cooperate with other humans. Yet most people have failed to develop the ability to set a vision, make decisions, become leaders, or build teams. Over the past century, the culture of the United States in particular has overemphasized and forced competition and its methods. This is because the traditional education system has supported an industrial model. Instead of teaching students to cooperate, lead, and work collaboratively, it standardized everything. It taught them to take meaningless ranking-based tests, fostered a sense of competition, and failed to properly assess individual value. The basis of self-worth was placed in how well one performed against other individuals on tests or assignments. Given that, it is no surprise that the dominant culture of American corporations is highly individualistic and competitive rather than collaborative. Dr. David Logan, a professor of management at the University of Southern California, has found in his research that most organizations have a 'Stage 3 culture.' This culture can be summed up as internal competition where each individual fights for themselves and is willing to do whatever it takes—slander, gossip, anything—to rise above their colleagues. Organizations with a 'Stage 4 culture' that emphasizes teamwork and cooperation and focuses on the group's excellence and qualities rather than the individual are much rarer. In reality, in business and sports, the Stage 4 culture is far more productive and brings greater success than the Stage 3 culture.
Henry David Thoreau is famous for saying in Walden, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." We believe the main reason people lead such lives is that they have been taught to think individualistically rather than cooperatively. With rapid changes in technology, information, and globalization, the world is inching away from the existing ways of thinking and living. The teaching methods and principles of the public education system are also being reviewed. More and more people are seeking work that is collaborative, flexible, and meaningful. People who are skilled at building relationships with mentors, teachers, and partners have a growing chance of creating extraordinary wealth and freedom. Moreover, as technology advances rapidly, jobs once performed by specialists are handled by outsourcing or by machines. No matter how outstanding your technical skills are, in five years they may be worthless. But the ability to connect with people, to learn, and to collaborate is becoming increasingly valuable in today's society.
We no longer live in a world of 'method' where limits abound. Instead we live in a world where 'collaborators', including technology, provide faster, bigger results and more freedom than ever before. The era of relying solely on competition and method is passing, and as a result we can generate far more freedom of purpose. We have more options. It has become easier to find what we want, build a team to support us, and have a visible impact on people around the world.
"The only way to change the present is to change the future."
Key points
Focusing on 'how' makes your thinking rigid and uncooperative.
Focusing on 'how' creates stress. You are too busy to juggle everything.
Focusing on 'how' isolates you inside your goals and slows your progress.
Isolated inside your goals, your dreams shrink.
Competition obstructs creative innovation and limits the future.
Collaboration expands freedom of purpose and vision. Because there are many times more things you can do with others than you can do alone.
Collaboration helps you focus on what you want to focus on. And it frees you from the guilt of receiving help.
Collaboration brings better and more astonishing results than planning and working alone, and lets you have a bigger impact. By expanding vision, freedom of purpose also expands.
"When you enter a new situation you must know what is non-negotiable."
You could just be a bricklayer, or you could be building God's temple
"I think a hero is one who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with freedom." – Bob Dylan
Winners don't ask how to work; they ask who to work with
"Without Babs, there is no Strategic Coach." – Dan Sullivan
Strategic Coach (the Circle) today runs workshops in many countries and locations and offers a variety of programs. Its flagship is an introductory program led by associate coaches who were themselves successful entrepreneurs and long-time Strategic Coach clients. Sullivan himself leads the 10X Ambition Program and the recently formed Free Zone Frontier Program.
