1. At root, problems arise 1) because things don't go the way I want them to, and 2) because I keep insisting on living by my own temperament. Most of them come from trying to do what can't be done. Acknowledging that something simply isn't possible matters.
I can't give other people everything they want. If I can, fine; if I can't, that's that.I need to bring some breathing room — for myself and for others — to the way I deal with relationships.
In fact, sometimes the worries get so tangled up that my head is so cluttered I don't even know what I'm worrying about anymore. There are plenty of cases where I don't really know what I'm trying to say, but I'm just generally exhausted.
1. A baseball player gets demoted from the first division to the second. He goes in for a counseling session about retiring out of self-disgust — when he started in middle school, was it for the money or because it was fun? His salary in the second division is ten times what it was when he first got drafted. Even if he's dropped from where he was a moment ago, he's still way higher than where he started.
Trying to live happily while continuing to be miserable is itself a contradiction.
Anger comes from thinking I'm right and the other side is wrong. And then when the other person doesn't acknowledge that, I get angry. It's being captured by myself. Especially when I'm trying to do good work and it doesn't go well — "What? Why is this happening?" — anger is bound to follow. I get trapped inside my own world.
My — Not YouTube but "Me-Tube." We think we're touching all kinds of information through different media, but as much as we follow recommendation algorithms, we end up trapped inside ourselves. Flip that logic and launch a Me-Tube app.
1. Change itself is not the problem. Living in a changing world while not wanting to change — that thought is what produces the agony, isn't it?
1. Balance is, in theory, very easy. In practice, you can't get up there. It's not impossible, but it isn't easy. It's possible, but it's hard. So: it's hard. You just have to try balancing a few times. In other words, you need many attempts, challenges, scrapes, and practice. It feels difficult because we're looking for a one-shot method. There is no such thing. If you want to lift something effortlessly, lift something small; there's no method for lifting something heavy without effort. This isn't a method problem, it's a greed problem.
1. And these worries arise on the premise of "I have to do something" in the first place. But in life there isn't anything you "have to do" or "must not do."
Before "what should I do or not do," we have to step back to a stage before that. Before anything, we need to "become aware" of "what state we are in right now."
So instead of "I shouldn't be drowsy," it's "ah, I'm in a drowsy state."
Instead of "I'm angry," it's "ah, I'm in an angry state."
Once you become aware, you can choose what comes next.
After awareness, "whether to express anger or not" turns into a matter of choice. But we let the anger out before we know it. With awareness you can take responsibility for your choices, but without awareness you can't take responsibility — or you don't want to.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J930eS87cps&list=LL&index=1
