On the First Draft, the Garbage Draft
- subtitle : THOUGHTS DOING AFTER BEING
1. The first draft.
It means there's "something" you can improve on. And the reason a shabby (even if shabby) first draft matters more than anything is because there's "something" you can look at again and revise. So in one way or another, some kind of initial form, no matter how shabby, is necessary.
But many people misunderstand the word first draft, the GARBAGE DRAFT.
(In your thirties) you shouldn't compare yourself to others. You should compare yourself to yesterday's self. If you get just a little better than yesterday, that's already a good sign. So you shouldn't make the mistake of trying to produce a perfect first draft just to avoid letting others see that rough-garbage-like early version of your work. What matters is that you get something out of it and learn something. You don't need to pay money just to avoid being treated like a fool or being seen as an absolute beginner.
Learning something is really about putting yourself into the state of being a FOOL. If you don't become a fool, you can't start anything new. If you can't start anything new, there's no progress. Wanting to become a fool is the beginning of change.
The first draft is extremely important.
If you can be sufficiently positive about being alive, you stop clinging to the rest. Instead of trying to prove your existence through "salary," you become able to care about the values of morality (transcendent morality, ultimate meaning) and ethics.
In an era crowded with HOW-TOs, many people are preoccupied with how to make their lives "*poof*" and instantly change. But that can't be all there is to life. Before worrying about DOING, we also need to think deeply about BEING. If you can't positively affirm the fact of your own existence in this world, is there any hell worse than that? There'd be nothing but anxiety, and every moment would feel terrible. We're fragile beings, after all. And no matter what you do or where you are, there wouldn't be anything that feels useful or valuable to you or something you feel able to do.
My abilities should be used for me, not for others. But, to keep the thing I prioritize most from breaking me, it's important to pay respect to the fact that I, that we, are alive and are surrounded by other living things. And if you take care of yourself the way you'd take care of a life entrusted to you, it may help to write down what your life will look like 3-5 years from now.
