When a discontented thought toward the other rises,
(in slightly more dignified phrasing) when a mind that wants to argue right and wrong about the other arises, try thinking like this..
Acknowledging that they are different from me; accepting them as they are.
Right? Too cliché? Then,
Adopting an attitude and behavior just enough to keep my own mind comfortable, just enough not to let it bother me.
If we get a bit more practical, with the heart of taking care of myself a bit more,
Regarding the actions or attitudes of others,
judging and acting not by overly obvious common sense and concepts
or pure intent or sincerity,
but only for myself, right here, right now,
in real-life survival
and considering practical interests for me as I am.
And yet, thinking a bit more,
"Why can't you do as much as I can?
Vs 'It's not easy to do as much as me, after all'"
Think about which of these
is showing me more respect.
Maybe this is, in the end,
not about the other person but about
a matter of affection or trust toward myself.
Maybe, being a bit more honest,
if-, perhaps-, surely it must (have been) like that-,
these thoughts
that, no matter how much I try to forget,
don't get erased and only multiply -
that's because the wronged feelings I cannot tell anyone about
and that aren't getting any sympathy
- I'm trying so hard to explain them
at least to myself, perhaps -
that's a thought I can have at least once, too.
And this kind of thought
basically isn't possible without will and courage.
The courage to look at myself as I am,
the will to take myself where I want to go.
Ah, and
in actions like this, (more than composure..)
there is no weapon as good as breezy banter.
If, after summoning the courage,
you get rejected?
Even so, that's a thank-you - because I no longer have to
explain myself to myself.
From then on, I drive easy, my own way.
And probably - from that point on, the explaining
might shift to being the other person's job ;)
After time passes,
you find that the right and wrong of that day, like a piece of paper rolling on the road, gets flipped front-and-back countless times.
The last month of 2024,
fortunately, having gone through one big emotional storm
around the start of the month,
I tidy up a corner of my mind that's tangled and broken -
